All My Children - MESSAGE BOARDS

i am really confused. obvviously I do not think that a poster should be rude to another but are we just to praise every character, actor, story line, morals, clothes, make-up, pairing, drugging, going to bed with anyone anything? is it going to be a case if u cannot say anything nice say nothing at all? i don't mind a good debate, sometimes i change my mind, other times no. if i called another poster an idiot or called susan luccia a , well you can fill in the blank then that would also be wrong.but can i not say that besides the story line of erica and ryan pairing, i also think to me it is kind of un-nerving that as susan and her husband are good friends in real life and think of ryan as their son and an extended family member, that just kinda does not set well with me that they would have a passionate pairing on set.maybe I am a prude for feeling that way. i am not an actor or around actors so maybe that is the norm and shows what great actors they are.
also I have heard bad and good about scott. maybe in real life he is a great person, probably is, but i don't think anyone can despute the fact that the writers have not seemed tp be able to make up their minds if he is to be an evil man or a goody two shoes, or maybe that IS the point they are making.he may have or be about to sleep with his uncles girl. he may have killed that doctor that was hung. he may have covered up the whole valve thing that almost killed ian. he was hot for marissa when jr was going with her.should we crucify him for it? after all Tad killed dr. madden in one of the coldest manners i can think of and know tad is the next father whoever that shows up for the x-mas miracles. apparently he can marry people.This is a soap in a fictional land and to be good i now there has to be dramatic creative license. now what i am about to say i guess is an example of poster bashing and i sincerely do not mean it to be. but a poster said that scott was a great role model for the young viewers of AMC. maybe I am missing something. and I like to look into myself and see if I am looking at it wrong. that may not be the best example but tv does influence our young people and adult people and I myself if half the things about scott are true i would not want a young viewer to look to him as a role model. but I do appreciate the poster giver his opinion and making me think. recently in my own life a person told me i needed to be less judgemental. it was a very emotional family situation and alot of underling circustances that not everyone was aware of so depending on how u looked at it and how much u knew it could really color the way you saw it. i may have won the battle in that after all the facts were out I was vindicated, but I think I lost the war in how i presented my case and made people think less of me, well one person. the point is I think alot can be learned from soaps, more sp if you get to get others opinions. i try to be a better person from stories i hear in the news. i don't know if i am making much since but i respect alot of the posters here, probably all of them and i just don't want them to be afraid to post because i find it pychology 101. how boring it would be if we all thought alike.jmho and if the administators think this is offensive then i guess i will miss posting on here. and i do appreciate the moderators very much and know that there has to be rules. i just guess the rules are kind of blurring to me.

Yes. It would be boring if we agreed with everything and praised every character.

But I do think there's a double standard between poster and replier. Where if a replier disagrees with a poster, it's all well and good. But if the poster disagrees with a replier than the poster must have everybody thinking like them. That doesn't make sense.

There shouldn't be two different *rules for poster and replier.

Now, according to the guidelines a poster CAN disagree with the replier.

However, there is like some unwritten rule were a poster cannot disagree with a replier. Because a lot of times a replier would get in attack mode towards the poster and make the poster look like some sort of villain.

And the whole double standard does nothing but causes drama. I love debating. Debating keeps this place interesting. But a lot of times, I feel like I can't debate without it turning into a fight, which leaves me feeling confused. It's like the person I'm debating with, no matter whom I'm debating with HATES the fact that I'm disagreeing with him or her.

It's like they want me to stop or start liking a character and blindly agree with them because they say so.

You can debate me anytime, Feie!

I concur with you two that the lines of appropriate vs. nonappropriate blur sometimes. It is my understanding you are not allowed to bash the actor. So for example, I cannot say "Jane Doe is a terrible actor and I hate her."
I can criticize the character, however, as long as it is framed in a factual way. So I could say, "The character of John Doe is acting terribly based on the way he manipulated his father today."

As for the poster/replier problem...I see a lot of feathers ruffled, often for silly reasons. Debating is fun!!! I have witnessed people personalize things when they feel attacked for their opinion being disagreed with. All I can say is that certain individuals I stay away from, and others I respond to gladly, because I find them insightful and intelligent, even if they disagree with me. I think you just need to exercise caution and be respectful, and if the other person is offended, then that is their issue, not yours.

count me in your debates as well.i know a poster quite a while back suggested a thread for just getting to know our fellow posters.we could discuss anything.unless that is against the rules, which i could understand if it was. this is a soap board and the administrators have enough to do but if the administrators go for it I would like to second the motion.for example I would like to know how treester is doing and what is going on in feie's job situation.and there have been tibits of other posters lives like how the soap brought them together with their mom or what their thoughts were on erica or even the young brooke english in the 70's.stuff serious or funny.just a thought.

Wow! Tami! That's a GREAT idea.
But I don't think the admins would go for it since it's "soaps.com" if we all start to talk about our personal lives and what's going on with us.

I don't think it would be related to soaps anymore. I do have my own website with ning, tho.

I'm the creator of Free2Be.ning.com. It's a place for people of all religious backgrounds, of different sexual orientations, to feel free to be themselves. Like openly gay, it's not for people with closed minds, tho.

I would give you my email address, but I wouldn't want other people to see it.

And here's my youtube url.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Feie15

Well on other boards on this site they have a thread called "Chit Chat" and you can talk about whatever you want to. I mean anything! It does not have to be about soaps. So maybe someone should start one for this board!

Hey Tami!

Well, I'm sure Feie can tell you that she and I were at each other's throats earlier this year, but now have learned to just disgree with dignity, and not start dumb arguments. Sure, we still disagree on things regarding Kendall and Annie, but we can talk without arguing now. LOL

But all that aside, what I hate are OTHER people who enter the debate, without knowing what's going on, or without knowing the "history" behind the people at odds, coming in taking sides; putting on capes to stick up for certain people. If I see two people arguing, there is no need for me to jump in or instigate.

So confusing. Last week I replied to a poster who liked a character. I don't happen to like the character. I did not say the poster was wrong. I simply said why I don't like the character. I was reprimanded for "bating" the poster. I went back and read my reply and I just couldn't see anything nasty in it. I apologized anyway, and sincerely. Since then a lot of people have supported me. Thank you. Isn't the point of the board to give our opinions? Wouldn't it be really boring if we all just agreed on every point? I'm hoping I haven't gotten it wrong. We can have different opinions, right? I'm sure that since I've been on this board I have always seen people disagree in a nice way. I agree, when you see a reply to a post that has a different opinion, it sometimes changes your mind and gives you something to think about. I find it fun.

CAT1005, agree to disagree is a great way to put it! Thank you.